DW2K8 ends...DW2K9 begins!

It's that time of year again! The holidays are over, and it's time to break out your lists and make sure that we didn't miss any deaths this year!

The last death that will count is one that happens before 11:59:59 PM on February 1st, 2009. We will wait a week to award prizes to make sure all obscure deaths trickle in.

New lists will go into effect at 12:00:00 AM on February 2nd.

Several of you still owe $ for 2008...so let's get paid up so I can pay out to the winner! I have a ledger (not Heath) that I can check if you're not sure that you paid.

Please let me know ASAP if you're playing again in 2009 even if you don't have your list ready yet.

Thanks for a great year, and here's looking forward to the next one!

Also, the new site can be found with this year's rules (they are simply a cut and paste of last year's) at: http://deathwatch2009.blogspot.com

Enjoy!
Grim

"Look, Boss!! Ze Grave! Ze Grave!"

Famed Hispanic actor Ricardo Montalban died this week. Montalban is perhaps best known for his portrayal of wishmaker Mr. Roarke on the ridiculous somebody-must-have-been-high-when-they-accepted-this ABC show "Fantasy Island." Who can forget his suave delivery: "Smiles everyone, smiles....My dear guests, I am Mr. Roarke, your host. Welcome to Fantasy Island!"

Sci-fi geeks will forever know him as the overly-chest-muscled titular villian, Khan Noonien Singh, in "Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan." I don't know for sure, but I think Montalban took his last words in real life from his character: "From Hell's heart I stab at thee. For Hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee."

Charo and Barbie Benton are scheduled to "shake it for the camera" at a memorial service this weekend. The coffin will reportedly be lined with "soft Corinthian leather."

Ricardo may help The Oracle's fantasy come true, as he makes a late-season run at the title with Ricardo's 12 points!

Six Feet Deep Throat

Linda Lovelace, a porn actress famous for her performance of deep throat fellatio in the enormously successful 1972 hardcore porn film Deep Throat, has died. Her body of work also included the 1971 bestiality flick Dog Fucker/Dogarama. Details are sketchy right now but, early indications are that...

Wait, what?

It was some old guy?

Damnit. Let's try this again.


W. Mark Felt, who to my knowledge has never appeared in a pornographic film or performed fellatio on a man, has died. The No. 2 official at the F.B.I. when he helped bring down President Nixon by resisting the Watergate cover-up, he was famously known by only the moniker "Deep Throat" to conceal his identity. The term was an allusion to the 1972 film of the same name. Which he was not in. But probably enjoyed. He was 95.

Anonymous sources clued Deady Money in on Felt's impending demise. Deady Money insists that 5 points is the national average, and not small at all.

Turning the Last Page

Bettie Page, a legendary pinup girl whose photographs in the nude, in bondage and in naughty-but-nice poses appeared in men's magazines and private stashes across America in the 1950s and set the stage for the sexual revolution of the rebellious '60s, has died. She was 85.

Morrigan attempts to tie up some of the competition by earning 15 points, hoping to pin-up the winnings when it's all over.

Dead Hand Luke

Paul Newman, the legendary movie star, irreverent cultural icon, and only successful thing to come out of Shaker Heights, Ohio, has died. He was 83.

The Oracle will probably celebrate with a light salad, some pasta, and a bowl of popcorn, and hope that the 17 points earned will, in the end, reveal the color of money.

Samuel L. Jackson's Demise to Complete Karmic Cleansing of "Soul Men" Deaths

Bernie Mac died of "pneumonia" on Saturday morning. Isaac Hayes keeled over of an apparent "heart attack" on Sunday. Samuel L. Jackson knows better. Fueled by an unshakable paranoia that he developed while shooting "Snakes on a Plane," Jackson knows that his death will come on Monday, August 11th.

Mac, Hayes and Jackson all star together in the upcoming abysmally bad movie "Soul Men," which is why, Jackson claims, they have all been marked for death.

"It's kinda like that 'Final Destination' bullshit," Jackson said while nervously pulling on a twitching cigarette and scanning the room, "I know that fuckin' reaper is coming, and there ain't nothin' I can do to stop it! I shoulda listened when my agent told me not to do this shitty movie with these guys. I figured a Razzie nomination or two, but not a complete Karmic Retribution."

None of the DW2K8ers have any of the trio of Soul Men, even the still-alive-for-now Jackson. Hundreds of points go unclaimed, and speculation as to why Steven Segal, Yahoo Serious and Frank Stallone are still alive continues.

Golden Girls Curse Kicks into High Gear

Well, I think we all saw this coming. Everyone always said the 80s sitcom The Golden Girls was cursed. And now the lead actresses are starting to--you should pardon the split infinitive--mysteriously die off.

Estelle Getty, the 84-year-old actress who played Sophia on the long-running NBC program, was the only first to die.

Rumors of a curse on the show came to the surface when the program was canceled after only its seventh season! The curse might have come because the show was shot on a sound-stage that sat atop an ancient Indian burial ground. Or maybe one of the producers opened an ancient Egyptian tomb. Both of which are pretty good explanations of where they might have found Bea Arthur.

Anyway, one Golden Girl is dead. Who will be next?

Three DW2K8ers backed the right horse (by horse, we mean Dead Golden Girl) and scored themselves a tidy 16 points.