Bernie Mac died of "pneumonia" on Saturday morning. Isaac Hayes keeled over of an apparent "heart attack" on Sunday. Samuel L. Jackson knows better. Fueled by an unshakable paranoia that he developed while shooting "Snakes on a Plane," Jackson knows that his death will come on Monday, August 11th.
Mac, Hayes and Jackson all star together in the upcoming abysmally bad movie "Soul Men," which is why, Jackson claims, they have all been marked for death.
"It's kinda like that 'Final Destination' bullshit," Jackson said while nervously pulling on a twitching cigarette and scanning the room, "I know that fuckin' reaper is coming, and there ain't nothin' I can do to stop it! I shoulda listened when my agent told me not to do this shitty movie with these guys. I figured a Razzie nomination or two, but not a complete Karmic Retribution."
None of the DW2K8ers have any of the trio of Soul Men, even the still-alive-for-now Jackson. Hundreds of points go unclaimed, and speculation as to why Steven Segal, Yahoo Serious and Frank Stallone are still alive continues.
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